Sales Person classic

[Joe]

You mean when they try to explain technical information to customers? I love it when I type specific instructions to a CSR and then the email comes back to me with their "reworded" version.  :laugh:

That is called translating to dumb-ass.

[ratintrap]

Just have them send it in Adobe.  :wink:

[hotmetal]

You mean when they try to explain technical information to customers? I love it when I type specific instructions to a CSR and then the email comes back to me with their "reworded" version.  :laugh:

That is called translating to dumb-ass.

I worked for a printer that did a lot of padded internal bank transfer forms. I was the only one supposed to work on this, because mine were always right, of course. I was supposed to fill in a blank space or two with promotional notepads for the company. Sometimes I'd be bored and just make something up for my own amusement. Like this one:

"Give me a place to stand, a fulcrum, and a honking big Macintosh and I can move the world!"

I almost got fired because a salespuke was sure the word "fulcrum" was slang for somethng sexual, and apparently no one else in the front office understood it either. Obviously they'd never read it in the original Greek...

[Slappy]

I read this title and I fume because our 'Lead Salesguy' keeps shoving work down our throat. The work orders and paper orders are wrong, the wrong paper is sitting on the floor (although it can be used), additional jobs added to project = more paper not on floor, more bindery items/time...our X700 is already booked up with their stuff, another job is added. All has same due date.

All normal, right? 

I'd say - yeah, pretty much! We had a job approved Monday that was 15,000 sheets on the large Xerox. That's 2 days of running, easy. Then another book approved that day that was 4+ hours, not to mention all of the little jobs & proofs still rolling in and it was ALL set to be due by Wed. Physically impossible but nobody would budge or even have a Production Meeting to schedule anything. I'm staying the hell away from that dept as much as possible the next few days, I'll tell ya that much.

[Grimace]

I have a friend who speaks in riddles. It's infuriating. Takes me 10 minutes to translate him asking if I want to go out for beers.

Just had our custom sales person come down and she leads with, " You remember that "customer" job we had all the problems with?"
I'm like "yeah..."
She goes onto say, "Well, I just got a call from the owner of "customer" and I just had to laugh. You wouldn't believe what he had to say about the job."
Me, "uh huh, do tell, what stupid problem was found now"
"Well, do you remember how we had to reprint and fix the cutting and the round corners and remember how we didn't know if all the files were messed up like the sample the bindery had?"
Me "get to the point"
"Well, ha ha, I get a call from the owner....ha, ha and he goes on to tell me that he opened the job, ha ha, and he ha, well he said he couldn't believe his eyes, haha"
Me "What is your flipping point!!"
"Well, he just loved how it all turned out."

I told her great, lead with that next time or I'll punch you in the mouth you fat ugly bitch.
Or actually I think I said, "Oh."

[DigiCorn]

Reminds me of the last time I got pulled over for speeding.

Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going?"

Me: "No you fascist bastard. You're the one with the radar gun; Why don't you tell me?"

Well, actually what I think I said was, "No sir. That's probably why I got pulled over for speeding."

[Skryber]

 

I hate small talk........unless I'm trying to get them into bed.

[gnubler]

Hot MILFs have that option.