Some of you may or may not know, I took on a second job a few months back handling the production of a local magazine. Since that time, it has been a real struggle to get it out on time because of the SalesPukes and their lack of honoring any kind of deadline. If I set a deadline for the 25th of the month, I get shit all the way till 1 day before print, sometimes after. When I try to address these issues, I get the typical bullshit responses that you would expect; customers are dragging their feet, I couldn't get this or that... whatever.
Now, the guy I work for is also the same guy I trained about a year ago on a Mac. It was a freelance/consulting/training gig and since, this guy and I have worked together in some capacity or another until I finally ultimately took over production. I have the usual battles concerning low rez images, or non-existent artwork, but lately the SalesPukes have been getting even lazier. I used to get 2 full weeks to get a 64 page mag done, now I get a week for the same pay.
Last night, I was called into a production meeting last minute. Beforehand I was told that this is my show and ANYTHING I decide goes. I told him some of my ideas about possible fining the Pukes when they exceed the deadline. This was based on the comment I made to him regarding the only way to get a Puke to do what you want is through his wallet. He agreed and furthermore will be subject to the same fine... 1 minute or 5 days past deadline... 50% of their commission goes in my pocket. I told them all, i would rather not have your money and NOT have to stay up for 3 consecutive days straight making up for lost time. Honor the deadline, honor your wallet.
After, my boss says to me, "earlier today, I told the entire Sales Staff, this is Jason's magazine. He has ultimate authority on what goes in and what does not. If you piss him off and he leaves, I am shutting the doors and working at McDonalds. If you work hard, you will be rewarded, if you don't, look for another job. I'm tired of your shit!"
I call this a victory, and 20 years of bent up frustration with Sales Pukes. Hahahahahahaha!
BTW, I am NOT a Desinger, I am a Prepress guy riding the line to the Dark Side. Scary, scary shit.
Sales :puke2:
Sales :puke2:
Sales :puke2:
Sales :puke2:
Sales :puke2:
Well fucking done!
Even in these hard times pukes just don't get it.
I know. I already make their life Hell, now I have to authority to back it. Heheheheeheh, it's like giving a bazooka to a 12 year old.
I thought you quit? :tongue:
Thanks, you made me smile. There still may be hope for the rest of us. You are our leader.
All Hail Jason! Hoorah!
Quote from: Stiv on April 07, 2010, 02:59:13 PMThanks, you made me smile. There still may be hope for the rest of us. You are our leader.
All Hail Jason! Hoorah!
Nooooooooooo! :death:
Fuck, check this out... my normal job, they are firing my manager tomorrow. I am now in full command of Prepress. WTF?!? I can't handle all this good news, I'll probably stroke out on the way home.
Sit on the floor, put your head between your legs, and kiss your a$$ goodbye. :laugh:
Congrats though. :ninja2:
Yeah, I am still in shock. Very, very unexpected. My compadres here are all in shock. It is very unlike my company to do something to actually help my department.
Thanks Joe.
Quote from: Stiv on April 07, 2010, 02:59:13 PMThanks, you made me smile. There still may be hope for the rest of us. You are our leader.
All Hail Jason! Hoorah!
Hahahahahahah, you don't want that. But let it be an inspiration to you all. Sales Pukes don't always win.
it's okay, it's just a dream....
now, outwiththebad... inwiththegood...
it'll all be better in the morning
I am still in a daze right now. I was just told it I have carte blanche control and whatever I need as far as OT is approved. It's like a dream Dave, I still can't believe it.
...for some strange reason something comes to mind about foxes in the hen house and patients running the nut ward comes to mind. :undecided:
oh yeah... congrads DCS.
Cool! :cool:
Dont worry DCS, the honeymoon will be over soon, they never last. Just dont turn into the idiot that was there before you!
The only way I could turn out like him? If I were dead. He's that worthless. .125% more helpful then say, Blood Sausage, but worthless just the same. I have no worries. That place will run like a greased pencil through a butthole. The reason I know... 6 months ago he was out with Meningitis for almost a month. That department never ran smoother. Out of loyalty they kept him in power, but after so many chances.... I'm just happy for the opportunity.
similar situation going on here. now i need to deliver on all the shit i talked the past few years. uphill battle all the way, staff already wants hang to me. making some un-popular decisions, but thats what has to be done.. if the last jackass did that hed still have a job.
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 07, 2010, 03:31:09 PMFuck, check this out... my normal job, they are firing my manager tomorrow. I am now in full command of Prepress. WTF?!? I can't handle all this good news, I'll probably stroke out on the way home.
enjoy it while you can, because it never lasts. Quote "Wall Street".......
Congrats, any job openings? What's the pay? I don't do this or that, I want 3 weeks off for vacation the first year, my workstation must be prestine, the slightest smell of cigarette smoke sends me into a dazed and confused state, I want t................................................
Have fun! :laugh:
(http://i276.photobucket.com/albums/kk30/DigitalCrapShoveler/shutterstock_2980159-1.jpg)
That's all I hear man. Hahahahaahaha!
Actually, thanks for the encouragement. :sarcasm: I know the drill, I just didn't expect it for a few more years.
I bet you couldn't wait for me to respond so you could post that damn banana. :laugh: I'm assuming you'll be a working supervisor, correct? If so, you'll do fine, however, if not then you'll be forced to become an ass kisser in order to keep your job 2.3 years from now. :tongue:
what do you mean, "become an ass kisser"...
he already is, he's been sucking up to Joe for some time now, and youston...
and now he's packing bananas for you Jim!
hahaha
Quote from: david on April 08, 2010, 08:15:04 AMwhat do you mean, "become an ass kisser"...
he already is, he's been sucking up to Joe for some time now, and youston...
and now he's packing bananas for you Jim!
hahaha
:laugh: :laugh: Soon we'll get a new member who'll be bitching about this crazy supervisor who wares a mask and kisses ass to no end, in Okeyhomy. :grin:
You're just pissed because I TOTALLY dropped the ball on your System 6 disks. They are on my desk boxed up, I just keep forgetting.
Jim, hahahahahaha, I wait your every post concerning me. It's the little things pal. But, yes, I am a working boss. I can't NOT work. It's a curse. I do it like I would want it done to me. I have little respect for a Manager that doesn't know my job better than I do.
I like it when a boss knows what the hell the worker bees are doing and how they do it.
How can you manage something without knowing what it is you're managing?
I have seen too many times when someone (upper boss guys) ask me a question, I go through the explanation, and then look at their eyes rolling in their head as they try to understand and then they eventually give up cause they don't have a clue.
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler, the hardest working person in prepressThey are on my desk boxed up, I just keep forgetting.
well, it's not like you got nothing else to do, right?
LOL
no biggie, it's just for the wall decor (after I rub 'em and hold 'em and dress 'em up)
:kiss:
You will get them. I spent the time to dig them up JUST for you, you're taking these bastards! Is that clear?!?
(https://www.b4print.com/MGalleryItem.php?id=97)
MY EYES!!!!
I knew he was from a parallel universe.
Hahahahaha, look at the disk hanging on the pillar behind my associate.
Quote from: Joe on April 08, 2010, 12:45:57 PMMY EYES!!!!
Yeah, whatta letdown. He doesn't look scary at all. :azn:
So, do you and the guy behind you have the same bald spot? hmmm... must be the solvent. :tongue:
congrats on the power shift too... prepress has a new dark lord. :toaster:
Quote from: Earendil on April 08, 2010, 01:24:38 PMSo, do you and the guy behind you have the same bald spot? hmmm... must be the solvent. :tongue:
congrats on the power shift too... prepress has a new dark lord. :toaster:
Yeah, we got the same bald spot. I usually keep it a lot shorter, but I haven't had the time.
Scary? I had to take a bath finally and lose the Hockey Mask. I got Tweedles watching me.
Got a meeting with the Bobs?
Funny, the owner is named Bob. Barely see him. When you DO have a meeting with him, after you feel like absolutely nothing was accomplished, yet you spoke for 20 minutes. He just nods and is probably thinking about pie.
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 01:40:26 PMFunny, the owner is named Bob. Barely see him. When you DO have a meeting with him, after you feel like absolutely nothing was accomplished, yet you spoke for 20 minutes. He just nods and is probably thinking about pie.
... As are all great men.
You know not what you say. Hahahahahahah! This guy IS Bill Lumberg. A gay Bill Lumberg, but Bill Lumberg all the same.
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 01:56:40 PMYou know not what you say. Hahahahahahah! This guy IS Bill Lumberg. A gay Bill Lumberg, but Bill Lumberg all the same.
hmmm.... maybe he is thinking about cake then....
Could be. I am not queer and I don't own the company. So who knows what he thinks. Wait, Youston might know.
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 02:08:03 PMCould be. I am not queer and I don't own the company. So who knows what he thinks. Wait, Youston might know.
But you do like cake and you are now middle management. I suspect you'll come out of the closet soon enough. Not that there's anything wrong with that. :tongue:
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 02:08:03 PMCould be. I am not queer and I don't own the company. So who knows what he thinks. Wait, Youston might know.
I'll have to ask my boss. Stand by.
:laugh:
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 12:32:21 PMYou will get them. I spent the time to dig them up JUST for you, you're taking these bastards! Is that clear?!?
(https://www.b4print.com/MGalleryItem.php?id=97)
Aw man! I've always had this image in my head that your workplace looks just like mine. Not even close. I feel dirty.
Don't feel ashamed. That is just the prepress pen. The rest of this place is a shithole. Did no one notice the 5.25" floppy hanging on the pillar?
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 02:44:37 PMDon't feel ashamed. That is just the prepress pen. The rest of this place is a shithole. Did no one notice the 5.25" floppy hanging on the pillar?
It can't possibly look more shit hole than mine. We are missing a floor in the lobby. We just tell people it's under construction. For a few years. People put random shit in my room (the plate room). I'll take pics for you someday.
I see the floppy. Nice touch. :laugh:
Okay you win. We aren't missing any floors, but the roof leaks BAD. On a rainy day, we got 50 gallon drums collection water all over the building. This place is roughly the size of a small Mall. It's pretty funny.
Quote from: DigitalCrapShoveler on April 08, 2010, 02:53:36 PMOkay you win. We aren't missing any floors, but the roof leaks BAD. On a rainy day, we got 50 gallon drums collection water all over the building. This place is roughly the size of a small Mall. It's pretty funny.
We have a leaky roof too but that out in the shop. We have a floor above us for digital shit. It's a disaster up there. This place use to be an old meat locker many many years ago. The shipping office is where the walk-in freezer was. We always start some sort of demolition around here and no one finishes it. I had to tape the dry wall in the plate room and my old manager painted it or it would have never been finished.
For some reason, Skry, when I think of your work, I picture it having a chocolate river and Oompa Loompas wandering about.
Quote from: Skryber on April 08, 2010, 02:49:01 PMPeople put random shit in my room (the plate room). I'll take pics for you someday.
Why the fuck do people do that? Same happens here. I walk in and shit is packed all around the platesetter and processor? Do you think it magically gets from one to the other? I barely have enough room as it is.
Quote from: Farabomb on April 08, 2010, 04:15:24 PMQuote from: Skryber on April 08, 2010, 02:49:01 PMPeople put random shit in my room (the plate room). I'll take pics for you someday.
Why the fuck do people do that? Same happens here. I walk in and shit is packed all around the platesetter and processor? Do you think it magically gets from one to the other? I barely have enough room as it is.
I literally made a pressman CRY one day because of this. I won't go into the wicked detail of it but he cried, then went and cried to the owner. The owner told him to quit fuckin' crying, go pick his shit up and stay out of prepress. :laugh:
STAY OUT OF PREPRESS.
The new 2010 catch phrase.
Think I'll print that on a banner in the new place. I'd put it on the door but the bosses thought it would be a better idea to have the plateroom and prepress have no doors and have just a 8ft opening. Guess they like the sound of me screaming and loud music.
Quote from: Earendil on April 08, 2010, 03:28:07 PMFor some reason, Skry, when I think of your work, I picture it having a chocolate river and Oompa Loompas wandering about.
I'm sure the walls don't taste like pineapples or bananas. Maybe asbestos. Mmmmmmm........
Quote from: Farabomb on April 08, 2010, 05:08:55 PMThink I'll print that on a banner in the new place. I'd put it on the door but the bosses thought it would be a better idea to have the plateroom and prepress have no doors and have just a 8ft opening. Guess they like the sound of me screaming and loud music.
That's what's nice about light sensitive plates. You can lock people out and they think you're loading plates. :ninja:
my head is spinning, it looks like everything is backwards...
ooohhhh, ooohhhh
(http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd148/davidma_01/1223.gif?t=1270817902)
Quote from: Skryber on April 08, 2010, 07:01:32 PMQuote from: Farabomb on April 08, 2010, 05:08:55 PMThink I'll print that on a banner in the new place. I'd put it on the door but the bosses thought it would be a better idea to have the plateroom and prepress have no doors and have just a 8ft opening. Guess they like the sound of me screaming and loud music.
That's what's nice about light sensitive plates. You can lock people out and they think you're loading plates. :ninja:
There will be a Nerf gun, a baseball bat (pressman adjuster), at least one knife and normally there is a firearm somewhere in the new shop. If all that fails there is a real good Mexican joint down the road. Chemical warfare. :blowup:
DCS, congratulations on getting actual respect at your new job. Don't feel bad about going over to the "dark side." Remember, it's always better to do stuff yourself knowing you can do it right, than to fix somebody else's crap. And you can use your considerable artistic talents to show those "designers" how it's done!
Thanks Possum. I really don't feel bad about dabbling in the dark side anymore. The entertainment I have received from the Sales Pukes there have made it more than worthwhile.