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Classifieds & News => Looking for Work => Topic started by: Joe on February 20, 2015, 04:12:34 PM

Title: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on February 20, 2015, 04:12:34 PM
Antarctica post office seeking job applicants who can dodge 'smelly penguins,' live without showering (http://news.yahoo.com/antarctica-post-office-job-port-lockroy-application-190236612.html)

[attachimg=1 width=300]Are you in good shape? Able to carry a big, heavy box over slippery rocks and slushy snow? Happy not to shower for up to a month, live in close proximity to three people and 2,000 smelly penguins for five months with no power, heat or hot water and limited communications on a small island off the coast of Antarctica?

If so, we have the job for you!

The U.K. Antarctic Heritage Trust is looking for assistants to help run its post office museum and gift shop at Port Lockroy, located on Goudier Island off the Antarctic Peninsula.

Applications are currently being accepted for up to four full-time seasonal positions at the remote outpost, which is visited each summer (November through March) by 18,000 people — who come by boat twice a day — and processes about 70,000 pieces of mail. Applications are due on Feb. 27.

You don't need to have post office experience to apply, but you do need an unusual skillset:

Can you demonstrate that you have most or all of the following?
• Good physical and medical fitness
• Confidence — can you give a talk without aids to 200 people and represent the UKAHT ‘live’ on TV and radio!
• Retail experience with good customer focus
• Competence and confidence with spreadsheet design and formulae
• Hands on DIY/practical skills — can you use hand tools proficiently?
• Coordination — can you carry a big heavy box over slippery rocks and slushy snow whilst dodging penguins?
• Environmental awareness and practical knowledge of minimum impact living
• Practical knowledge of another language as well as English

Do you possess the following attributes?
• Ability to get on with it. Can you identify what needs doing and get on and do it without having to be asked, whether it be washing up, sweeping the floor or digging snow?
• Quick learner – can you take an instruction in person or in writing and get on and do it efficiently?
• Awareness of your surroundings/situation
• Initiative – can you think on your feet and act?
• Adaptability to different situations – Are you happy not to shower for up to a month, live in close proximity to three people and 2,000 smelly penguins for five months?

As well as being passionate about the Antarctic. You need to be:
• Personable – do you value getting on with others? Can you live and work with just three others for five months and be friendly and cooperative throughout?
• Positive – can you enthuse to visitors when it is -5C° and blowing a blizzard as well as cook supper cheerfully after a long cold day and very little sleep?
• Conscientious – will you be doing your best day in day out for 5 months?
• Meticulous – can you keep accurate records be it penguin eggs, t-shirts, or food stock?

Prospective staffers must also be "prepared to be on call and smiling for all waking hours, seven days a week."

Not that you'd sleep, anyway. The average temperature on the island is about 36 degrees Fahrenheit in the summer, with almost 24 hours of sunlight.

The "smelly penguins" in question, gentoos, established a colony on the island in the mid-1980s and are the subject of an ongoing study by the British Antarctic Survey. As a result, half of the tiny island is off-limits to staff and visitors — which is why you must be "happy to be confined to a small island with no prospect of climbing the surrounding peaks."

The position pays about £1,100 (or $1,250) a month. Those selected for an interview will need to be available May 11 to 12 in Cambridge; successful applicants will need to be available for an additional five days of training in September.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Farabomb on February 20, 2015, 04:13:46 PM
Still better than prepress.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on February 20, 2015, 04:16:32 PM
The pay sucks worse than prepress though.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Farabomb on February 20, 2015, 04:54:49 PM
Hmmm... might be a good trade.

In Antarctica, only the penguins can hear you scream.

Pretty sure even if I took the job my old boss would want me to remote in and do some jobs.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Tracy on February 20, 2015, 05:00:22 PM
No Heat? :laugh:
No Way!
Probably no blow dryers either, I'm out.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Made in Taiwan on February 21, 2015, 01:39:42 AM
Antarctica? Is that not the place where the temperature plunges to -60℃ frequently? No way with that salary.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Possum on February 23, 2015, 12:30:14 PM
Shoot, that's more than my take-home. Maybe I should consider it. Oh, wait, it's only seasonal.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on February 23, 2015, 12:37:34 PM
 ???  A measly $1250 per month, to deal with all of that? Isn't that like minimum wage? I think I made that much working at Dairy Queen in high school, FFS... and the "penguins" at DQ were kinda cute, and not smelly.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on February 23, 2015, 12:51:04 PM
Quote from: Ear date=1424713054 link=msg=265882

???  A measly $1250 per month, to deal with all of that? Isn't that like minimum wage? I think I made that much working at Dairy Queen in high school, FFS... and the "penguins" at DQ were kinda cute, and not smelly.


That roughly comes out to $7.81 per hour for a 40 hour week but the ad states:

Quote
Prospective staffers must also be "prepared to be on call and smiling for all waking hours, seven days a week."


so that makes it more like a 16 hour day 7 days a week which makes the hourly total $2.79 per hour. If you could manage to sleep 23 hours per day that would bump you up to a respectable $44.64 per hour. :rotf:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on February 23, 2015, 01:21:57 PM
 :rotf:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Designia(o_O) on February 23, 2015, 04:49:29 PM
The wild penguins down there are psychotic. My brother was stationed at McMurdo and the little bastards will chase you down like the bulls in Pamplona. If you do take the job try not to piss off a penguin.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on February 23, 2015, 04:54:21 PM
... and you're probably not allowed to stomp them, since they are being studied.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Designia(o_O) on February 23, 2015, 05:01:34 PM
Well that and the stomping would be a sure fire way to piss them right the f**k off. They could become organized and mount a counter-attack.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on February 23, 2015, 05:03:32 PM
I wouldn't normally be afraid of birds, however, I've seen the Madagascar series of movies and have a mighty respect for penguins.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: DigiCorn on February 23, 2015, 11:18:44 PM
The pound has taken quite a dip lately. It used to be worth upwards of $5.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: StudioMonkey on February 26, 2015, 04:51:43 AM
Quote from: Ear date=1424728461 link=msg=265904

... and you're probably not allowed to stomp them, since they are being studied.

On the other hand, if you kill one and get away with it (I mean, who's going to know) the rest of them would probably leave you alone.  And they taste pretty good apparently.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on February 26, 2015, 11:39:21 PM
Must be a lot of people that likes cold air and penguins.

Antarctica 'Penguin Post Office' Job Attracts Record Number of Applicants (https://gma.yahoo.com/antarctica-penguin-post-office-job-attracts-record-number-194402318--abc-news-travel.html)

Quote
A job posting to man the "Penguin Post Office" in Port Lockroy, Antarctica, has received a record number of applicants: more than 1,500 since Feb. 16. In 2014, there were only 82 applicants all year long.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: DigiCorn on March 01, 2015, 10:23:38 PM
Speaking of jobs, I got two temp prepress gigs coming up, and a possible permanent part time job working for a beer publication. Score!
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Farabomb on March 02, 2015, 09:40:48 AM
Slip my address onto the mailing list.  ;)
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: DigiCorn on March 06, 2015, 12:15:46 AM
I have marketed myself as a temp fill in (part time only) as an Independent Contractor around town. I have 4 clients and working on #5. I only work when they need me (i.e. sick employee, someone wants a vacation, etc.). It's a goldmine niche because NO ONE is doing this. How many of you out there are a 1-man operation and can't take any time off (Cough F-Bomb Cough)? I started a new assignment today. Boy are these guys fucking hosed. They soft proof everything; essentially no rip and no color management to speak of. They have Apogee X, but don't use it for anything other than proofing. They use Symphony, but only RIP their files AFTER proofing and approval by the customer. They have a Presstek platesetter. FUCK. I learned their whole shop in less than 3 hours. NO PItstop. NO font management other than Fontbook. No RIP. They are getting a new platesetter soon, but not sure what they are getting. They have a Palladio but no longer use it. This place is in the dark ages. I will be doing their prepress person (who's been there 30 years) a HUGE FUCKING FAVOR by sitting down with the owners and telling them about 90 things wrong with their workflow.

Also, I hate fucking printing, and if I didn't have kids interested in shit, and need beer money, I'd be flipping burgers.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on March 06, 2015, 01:04:20 AM
Quote from: DigiCorn date=1425618946 link=msg=266345

I have marketed myself as a temp fill in (part time only) as an Independent Contractor around town. I have 4 clients and working on #5. I only work when they need me (i.e. sick employee, someone wants a vacation, etc.). It's a goldmine niche because NO ONE is doing this. How many of you out there are a 1-man operation and can't take any time off (Cough F-Bomb Cough)? I started a new assignment today. Boy are these guys fucking hosed. They soft proof everything; essentially no rip and no color management to speak of. They have Apogee X, but don't use it for anything other than proofing. They use Symphony, but only RIP their files AFTER proofing and approval by the customer. They have a Presstek platesetter. FUCK. I learned their whole shop in less than 3 hours. NO PItstop. NO font management other than Fontbook. No RIP. They are getting a new platesetter soon, but not sure what they are getting. They have a Palladio but no longer use it. This place is in the dark ages. I will be doing their prepress person (who's been there 30 years) a HUGE FUCKING FAVOR by sitting down with the owners and telling them about 90 things wrong with their workflow.

Also, I hate fucking printing, and if I didn't have kids interested in shit, and need beer money, I'd be flipping burgers.


Salesman had a prospective new customer talk to my boss today. He is using a 1995 Mac of some sort running PageMaker. No email. No internet. His burning question was 1) how does he get his photos onto his Mac and 2) how does he send his "chip" to us to get his files off of it? :wtf: This is pre-dark ages.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Slappy on March 06, 2015, 01:59:11 AM
Quote from: DigiCorn date=1425618946 link=msg=266345
This place is in the dark ages. I will be doing their prepress person (who's been there 30 years) a HUGE FUCKING FAVOR by sitting down with the owners and telling them about 90 things wrong with their workflow.

Yeah, you do realize that person likes the way they're doing things, no matter how bass ackwards it is & will instantly tell their boss that your ideas are worthless so they don't have to learn anything new, right? But hey, go forth & spread the Good Word man!

:lmao:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on March 06, 2015, 02:21:46 AM
Quote from: Slappy date=1425625151 link=msg=266351

Quote from: DigiCorn date=1425618946 link=msg=266345
This place is in the dark ages. I will be doing their prepress person (who's been there 30 years) a HUGE FUCKING FAVOR by sitting down with the owners and telling them about 90 things wrong with their workflow.

Yeah, you do realize that person likes the way they're doing things, no matter how bass ackwards it is & will instantly tell their boss that your ideas are worthless so they don't have to learn anything new, right? But hey, go forth & spread the Good Word man!

:lmao:


Not to mention the money they will save by staying in the dark ages.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Farabomb on March 06, 2015, 09:57:37 AM
I'm not unlike that. If it works then I'm in no rush to change. That being said I'm not blind to the new tech or things that can improve my throughput. You can't progress if you are stuck in the past. My platesetter is from 2004, but it works (most of the time). We just changed plates to a developerless system (new batch of problems for me to deal with). I just need a lot of time before I truly trust the new things. Something you don't get in prepress. That's why all the changes are the boss's idea and I tell him the potential issues. Not that he listens to me...

So Digi, want to come out to the right coast and cover for me when I'm on vacation? Yes I do things a little different (only use fontbook, FEX is acting funky) but I keep the press fed.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: born2print on March 27, 2015, 02:33:47 PM
http://www.newser.com/story/204577/help-wanted-brothel-tester.html
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on March 27, 2015, 03:09:29 PM
por favor acepte mi solicitud fregado :naughty:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: born2print on March 27, 2015, 03:22:20 PM
WTF!  :lmao:


Clean-up! Aisle 69!
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on March 27, 2015, 03:38:42 PM
How much would I have to pay to get this job? ;D
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: david on March 27, 2015, 03:49:40 PM
where do we get in line?
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: born2print on March 27, 2015, 03:53:24 PM
Go past the "Beer testers wanted" sign, through the $20/hr. to watch cartoons room and straight-on till morning.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on March 27, 2015, 04:29:29 PM
Quote from: born2print date=1427484140 link=msg=267413

WTF!  :lmao:


I was working the "multilingual" angle. ;D
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: born2print on March 27, 2015, 04:33:24 PM
The angle of the dangle is directly proportional to the motion of the ocean.
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: david on March 27, 2015, 05:10:43 PM
gotcha...    will you be there or do you want me to save you a space in line?
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: born2print on March 27, 2015, 05:22:39 PM
My application was rejected. "Over-qualified"  :banana:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Ear on March 27, 2015, 05:27:16 PM
Mine was rejected when they found out I worked teh prepress... dead giveaway that I didn't make enough money to have prior experience as a brothel patron. :embarrassed:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Made in Taiwan on March 28, 2015, 01:28:26 AM
Guys, sorry for disappointing you, but since I am German and can speak Chinese, too, I am the most qualified for this job!





Now, how do I tell my wife about the job change?
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Joe on March 28, 2015, 09:47:03 AM
Quote from: Made in Taiwan link=msg=267447 date=1427520506

Guys, sorry for disappointing you, but since I am German and can speak Chinese, too, I am the most qualified for this job!

Now, how do I tell my wife about the job change?


Very carefully and from a distance. :rotf:
Title: Re: Help Wanted
Post by: Made in Taiwan on March 28, 2015, 10:37:05 AM
Ooooohhh crap... I'll try... :shoots_self: :hangme: :death: :deadhorse:


:rotf: :rotf: :rotf: